


Useless

by EmpressCactuar



Series: SnK Kink Meme Fills [3]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gen, Implied Reiner/Bertholdt - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Light Angst, Self-Esteem Issues, Sort Of, Tattoos, but can be read platonically as well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 13:13:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21253946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmpressCactuar/pseuds/EmpressCactuar
Summary: Most of the warriors didn’t mind their summer uniforms. They were the best of the best, after all. Why would it matter if more skin were visible?(Or, words spoken about you appear on your skin)





	Useless

**Author's Note:**

> ** _any/any | labels_ **   
_things people say about you are magically printed on your skin. The more often people say it, the bigger and bolder the word will be, and sometimes the words are horrible and saddening._

Every Eldian has the word “devil” somewhere on their body. That’s just the way it is; when the words people speak of you appear on your skin, it’d only make sense that every Eldian would have it. And that one never faded; if people stopped speaking a word about you, eventually it would fade. But Eldians were and always would be devils. 

As for individuals, the words could wind up being a source of great pride or great shame. Some people were lucky, and negative words would be tucked away somewhere they were easily hidden. A monster might hide this by being fortunate enough to have it on their torso. 

Usually words spoken about oneself wouldn’t appear, but if it were repeated enough an individual could influence what was on their own body. 

Most of the warriors didn’t mind their summer uniforms. They were the best of the best, after all. Why would it matter if more skin were visible? Words of praise appeared on their skin, words that seem to be written in a pleasant script from being spoken in high regard. 

“Friend” was on Marcel’s arm, and he loved it. He was a joyous soul who was there for his friends and family. Of course he wouldn’t mind it. “Leader” was on his leg, evidence that others saw the potential within him. 

Annie never seemed to react to her words at all. “Powerful,” on her right forearm. “Quiet,” on the back of her neck, visible because her hair was always up. “Sweet,” in small letters along her calf. Who might be calling her that? “Pretty,” also in small letters, just a hair darker than sweet. 

Bertholdt didn’t mind his words. “Capable,” on his left calf. He was proud of that one. “Friend,” in smaller letters on his wrist. That one started getting darker after he got to know Reiner better. He smiled knowing Reiner was the one making it darker. “Destructive,” he didn’t care for but it grew darker as time went on. It made him feel more like he was a titan than a human. 

But Bertholdt always noticed Reiner was more comfortable in situations where he was able to cover his skin. The first time he saw Reiner’s words, he knew why. The letters were jagged and ugly, not spoken from praise but spite, disappointment. 

“Pathetic,” on his upper arm, pretty dark. Bertholdt knew Porco wasn’t helping that one, but it was too dark to be only one person. “Bastard,” in fading letters on the inside of his forearm. Reiner never ever talked about his father, not even to him. It had appeared since Bertholdt had met Reiner, though. Had something happened? 

This wasn’t to say he only had bad words on him. “Thoughtful” appeared on his leg, “kind” on his left wrist. “Stoic” wasn’t necessarily good or bad. It just was. 

But “useless” was the darkest, burned into his skin across his chest as though it were carved in with a knife. It was so dark that Bertholdt couldn’t help but wonder who was saying that about his friend so much. And the script… it was spoken with such malice it made Bertholdt wince every time Reiner changed in front of him. 

He was one of the only people aware of it. Reiner avoided taking his shirt off like the plague. 

“Can I ask you something you don’t have to answer?” Bertholdt asked one day, sitting with Reiner underneath a tree outside Reiner’s home. The blonde was holding open a book about Helos, reading it and admiring the illustrations of the Great Titan War. 

“Sure, what is it?” Bertholdt watched as Reiner turned to look at him, a smile on his face. ‘Friend’ had grown darker along the inside of Reiner’s arm, the script pleasant as a result of the fondness with which it was spoken. ‘Strong’ had started to form in tiny letters underneath ‘friend.’ 

“It’s about one of your words,” Reiner paused at that, his face unreadable. Bertholdt knew that asking about another person’s words was extremely taboo, considered impolite. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” 

“No… it’s fine. Let’s just go inside first,” Reiner said, sitting up and Bertholdt following after him, going into his room and closing the door behind them. 

“Why is such a bad word so big on your chest, Reiner?” Bertholdt asked, concern in his voice. Porco was one of the only people he had ever heard call Reiner useless. Porco by himself could _maybe_ cause a small word to appear in faded letters. 

Reiner winced at the question. “You haven’t said anything about it to anyone, have you?” 

“No, I wouldn’t do something like that,” Reiner turned to the mirror in his room. He unbuttoned his shirt, letting it fall open, the jagged letters in the same place they always were. His eyes seemed to glaze over. 

“Only you and mom and the doctor know about it,” Reiner said vacantly. “I never change my clothes in front of Marcel or Zeke or Porco,” 

“But I spend so much time with you, and nobody says that about you, Reiner,” 

“I am, though,” Reiner said, his eyes falling half-shut as he ran his fingers along the letters idly. “You know they almost didn’t give me the armored. I’m not a good fighter like Annie, I’m not a good leader like Marcel, I’m not smart like Pieck and Zeke, I’m not a good shot like you,” 

“But clearly you are useful, you beat out hundreds of kids to become a candidate, and then you still became a warrior in the end anyways,” Bertholdt added, Reiner turning to look at him. 

“I know, but…” Reiner’s expression seemed to fall. “Can I… tell you a big secret? If you never ever tell anyone else ever?” 

Bertholdt crossed the room and sat on the edge of Reiner’s bed, Reiner sitting next to him. “What is it, Reiner?” 

“My dad… he’s a Marleyan,” Bertholdt’s eyebrows shot up at the admission, his mouth hanging open slightly before he closed it back. “I thought if I became a warrior and honorary Marleyan my mom and dad could be together and we could be a real family. But when I got my titan I found my dad. And he ran and I knew he would never come home to me and mom,” 

“Reiner…” 

“I… was useless,” Reiner wiped at his eyes. “All I wanted was my mom and my dad, I was so sure I would get to be with them both, even if it was only for thirteen years,” 

It was Reiner himself, Bertholdt realized, that made that word appear on his chest. That would also explain why bastard had appeared recently too, even though it was fading. It’s not like his father would be talking about him much if at all. Every night he thought about all the work he put into becoming a Marleyan just to have his efforts be useless in the end. 

Bertholdt pulled his friend into a hug. “It’s going to be okay, Reiner. I know it must be terrible, going through that… But I’ll be here with you for thirteen more years, so I’ll make friend the darkest and biggest word on your body,” 

As fate would have it, useless faded from Reiner’s body over time, until it reappeared on his skin after Marcel died, the font jagged like never before. 

The Eldians on the island didn’t have devil on their skin. They told people they were just really bad kids before the walls fell. Devil faded over time, on all three of them. All three of them got new words the longer they spent. 

“Strong,” “friend,” “reliable,” were three that became prominent on Reiner, him taking pride in all three. “Capable” grew in size on Bertholdt, along with “friend,” “quiet” had also appeared but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Like what “stoic” was for Reiner, he supposed. 

Annie absolutely hated when “bitch” appeared on her skin. When Reiner and Bertholdt found the smartass cadet responsible for that they beat the shit out of him under the cover of night. It faded off Annie’s skin quickly. 

“Traitor,” “bastard,” and “monster” soon appeared on both Bertholdt and Reiner in massive, crooked letters. Both of them kept their skin covered at all times so that it wouldn’t remind them more than the completely fucked situation already did. “Friend” faded severely on both of them, but it never disappeared. Reiner would see to it that it stayed on Bertholdt forever, and Bertholdt did the same for Reiner. 

The day came when Reiner returned to Marley, Bertholdt no longer by his side. 

“Friend” slowly faded off his skin, Reiner’s heart breaking when he couldn’t see it anymore. “Stoic” grew darker by the day. Had it not been for his family and the warrior cadets, surely every positive word on his skin would be gone. For some reason “reliable,” “caring,” and “kind” stayed. 

Reiner took off his clothing, getting ready to turn in for the night. He and Bertholdt were going to live together and spend the rest of their terms back home, but now Bertholdt was dead and he was alone, and as little time was left in his term surely “friend” was gone forever. 

And Reiner knew why. 

The reason was carved onto his chest in dark letters.

**Author's Note:**

> wrote this because I was bored and couldn't sleep before work. not my best because it was written pretty quickly, but I still like it alright.  
find a kink meme prompt you're interested in? hit me up via e-mail or twitter, I may be willing to try it!


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